Sometimes I forget that it is already 2018. For some reason in my head it is still like 2010 or something like that. Or when people say things like “oh yea, my car is a 2011.” My first instinct it to be like “oh, so its pretty new.” No, its like 7 years old. Remember it is 2018 now.
Something else hit me this week as I was sitting at home thinking about the fact that it is 2018 (I know I think about the weirdest things): my two closest friends from home have been my friends for over 10 years. Which is saying a lot considering 4 years ago I moved over 1000 miles away from my childhood home, all three of us went to different colleges, and somehow through it when I come home it is like nothing has changed.
There is more to this post (hopefully) than me just talking about my friends and I. It is a post about loyalty, about love, about suffering, and about overcoming hardships (oh and there might be a funny story or two thrown in).
Loyalty is something that I find so incredibly difficult to find in the world today. People use each other, people only come around when it is convenient for them. You will have your work friends, and your school friends, and your sports friends, but then when you leave school or work or move somewhere else its like they left too. Now I’m sure their intention wasn’t to leave. I don’t think anyone walks into a friendship being like “when this person moves away I am moving on too”. Thats just the way change works; some things and people are left behind. So I guess the first thing I hope you can take away from this post is to be a loyal friend. Be the friend you want other to be for you. Take the time out of your day to call or text them, respond to their messages, let them know you are always there for them.
Love. Love might be even harder to find than loyalty in todays world. I’m not talking about like how you love pizza or watching Netflix, I’m talking about real person to person love. Like the kind of love that forgives mistakes, that sees past flaws, that is okay with imperfections. Y’all I wish I could say I am the perfect friend, but I am far from it. These two women have put up with over 10 years of my bad attitude at times, my unanswered text messages, my disagreements, my stubbornness, and me always thinking I’m right. But there has never been a moment that I doubted they love me. So I guess the second thing I hope you can take from this is to love fiercely. When your friend makes a mistake or upsets you take a step back, move forward, and love them anyway.
Suffering; kind of the worst sometimes. And the truth about true friendship is when your friend suffers you suffer with them. I have wrote countless blog post about the many ways I have suffered in life. I have written about my struggles with mental illness, with going to counseling, with feeling alone and isolated, and through all of that pushing people away. But these two never let me push them away. Rather they dove into the struggle with me. They texted me, they called me, they listened to me rant and be upset. Then when I came home for a week despite all the changes in my personal life it was like nothing changed in our friendship. So the third and final thing I hope you take away from this is don’t be afraid to suffer with your friends. Enter into their hurts, support them in what they are going through, and stand strong by their side.
Friends, here is the shortened version of all of this. Friendship is beautiful. Let your friends know you love them.
If you want to keep reading here is one of my favorite stories about each of them.
Okay, so first of all junior year homecoming. I didn’t have a date and one of the boys in my classes date bailed last minute. All of my friends were like “what are the odds you ask him to the dance?” I had no shame in asking a boy to the dance so in biology class I walked up to him and asked him to homecoming. Well fast forward a few years, my best friend is marry my homecoming date in 5 months. Crazy how things work out.
Second, I think it was like 2009 (maybe even 2008) and my friend asked me if I wanted to go take the 4-wheeler and go-cart out with her family and her parents friends. Of course, I said yes (what girl born and raised in the south wouldn’t want to)? Well, somehow as things tend to go when I am around it turned into a shit show. I didn’t have goggles for the 4-wheeler so her dad’s friend let me where his sunglasses and naturally a rock hit the sunglasses and then one of the lenses flew out so they called me popeye the rest of the trip. Its still an ongoing joke 10 years later.